1. Reflect on your identity and authenticity
Who are you? How are you? Why are You? These are big questions and need time and attention in order for you to truly stand in your power and appreciate your worth. Whether you work on the answers independently, or with a life coach, embarking on a journey of self-discovery will help bring out the best in you.
2. Realise your worth
This doesn’t come easy. We can go day to day feeling like we’re not enough – even to the point that we devise an invisible mask to pretend to others that we can be who they need us to be. But we need to feel it. Destroying your limiting beliefs through practising daily affirmations and breaking patterns of self-diversion by setting self-care time, will set you on your way.
3. Stop apologising
An apology is like a reflex for some of us, but over-apologising comes at a cost. Firstly, it dilutes the sentiment when there is a real and pertinent reason for apology, but secondly, it makes us appear and feel less confident. Try to hold back when you feel a ‘sorry’ forming and ask yourself if it’s really necessary? Repeatedly tell yourself that you are entitled to be present and to have your say.
4. Learn to hold space for yourself
Holding space is a powerful practise that will change your life. It means to be physically, mentally, and emotionally present – either for yourself, or for someone else. Ways in which you can hold space for yourself include: trusting your intuition; retaining your power; guiding yourself with humility; making yourself feel safe enough to fail; allowing yourself to make decisions that are different to what others would do; learn when to walk away; let the tears flow; practice mindfulness; and find sources of inspiration and creative outlets.
5. Set boundaries and practice saying ‘no’
It’s hard to set boundaries when you just want to please people and tick boxes – but once you start doing this you won’t want to stop. Setting boundaries starts with giving yourself permission to say ‘no’ and ends with you feeling that you managed to navigate a conversation or scenario to where you wanted or needed it to go.
6. Be more assertive
Practice speaking your mind. Take a few moments before you speak up, to formulate a succinct, articulate, and respectful way to say what is on your mind, and learn to accept any silences or pauses whilst it lands and rests with those who you have spoken it to.
7. Frame your arguments communally
Don’t make an argument just about yourself – make it for a wider group or cause. This shows your focus on the shared benefits and ambition as oppose to it being solely in your best interest.
8. Practice the art of diplomacy
Use diplomacy to show you are open-minded and appreciative of other perspectives. They are more likely to remain open-minded themselves
9. Show open-minded curiosity and open-hearted courage
The more curious, open-hearted and courageous you remain the more likely the people around you will see that open-heartedness is not a weakness – but a great strength. If it serves you well, it will serve them well to be this way too.
10. Ask for feedback
By showing that you are actively seeking to better yourself, that you can take criticism and use it constructively, or take praise and remain humble – puts you in the highest possible power, with yourself and with others.